​Ever notice that when you are having a bad day, or are so overly irritated with your significant other, co-worker, sibling, best friend, etc., a laugh can change the entire day and/or situation? You feel better in your body, the crankiness dissipates, you reconnect with that person, and you feel human again.

Laughter does that. It bonds us, benefitting relationships and our own sense of well-being. It has a host of physical benefits: burns calories, reduces stress, releases endorphins, increases immune system function, and supports our heart health. Having laughter in our lives benefits our mental and emotional health by reducing anxiety, increasing relaxation, and supporting resilience. Wow. If this were a prescription drug we’d be in line now. 

In this article about the benefits of laughter, there is a great list of ideas about how to bring more laughter into your life. Spending time with funny people, doing something silly, and sharing a joke or funny story are some of the suggestions.

Here’s something to get you started: a video of a juggler explaining the benefits of laughter - funny and silly! Maybe taking up juggling might be one of your new hobbies!

I’m lucky to have grown up with some silliness in my own family. Don’t get my mom and dad started with my daughter about the Snallygaster. My Grandmother Martha used to tell slightly smutty jokes with such cool elegance she would have had the queen giggling into her teacup. And my Grandmother Bootsie, with her incredible resilience and a twinkle in her eye, offered me this wisdom gleaned from her lifetime of physical challenges: “Well, you can laugh or you can cry. So you may as well laugh.” 

Originally published July 2022

Scritch, scritch. Huff, huff. Scritch, huff, huff, huff. Uhh! Oooof!!!
That’s me trotting down the trail, hitting a rock with one toe and finding myself all fours, having yanked my upper hamstrings but good. I take in the browns, yellows and dark oranges and burgundys of the crunchy leaves under my body. I take a breath. Nothing is broken, I can still hobble along. I dust off my gloved hands and running tights, and move on. 

I’m here on Emerald Mountain because of the deal I made with myself when hiking the Colorado Trail (CT) last July with my daughter. (The CT Part I and The CT Part II.) As I dragged up and down Thirteeners carrying more weight than I wanted to in my pack, I fantasized about the good ole days of doing Ironman - after all, that was just a one day thing. I didn’t have to get up each morning, unrecovered from the day before, and do it all over again, like I was doing on the CT. 

The CT experience taught me a lot. My top lessons: 
1) Charlotte has the patience of Job and the attitude of sunshine.
2) I can do more than I think I can - albeit more slowly than I think I should. 
I came off the CT ready for a one-day goal, and decided on the Run Through Time Trail Marathon in Salida this coming March. With Charlotte, of course.

This may not seem like a lofty goal to some - but for me, it is. My training has two components: increasing mileage (doable over time), and more time on trails (daunting). 

Years ago I did some trail training, but after a fall resulting in pain and tingling in my hands and wrists, I threw in the towel. I was scared of getting hurt again, so I stopped running trails. In hindsight, I can see that my life got smaller because of that fear and the choice I made. 

I started to address that fear and live a bit larger last March when Charlotte and I ran the Run Through Time Trail Half-Marathon - when crossing the finish line, I had completed my first trail race. However, the training for that half-marathon was on snowy roads. So when I committed to the full marathon, I committed to running on Emerald. It was time to face my fear.

When I headed up those trails on the last weekend in August, it was my first time to run Emerald in a decade. I made it to the top and was proud. But making it through the run without crashing and burning was my #1 point of pride. And though I’ve crashed since then, I continue to run Emerald. I just have to focus and use my core to lift those feet a little higher! Because being up there is worth the risk.

Running on Emerald Mountain is special. 

On Emerald, there is the sense of my body moving along the undulating trail. There is the sight of the sun climbing, beaming down on the aspen: shiny golden fountains erupting out of long white trunks. There is the effort of hoofing it uphill, lungs puffing white clouds into the chill fall morning, and the contrasting warmth of the day at the top. The fun of cruising along switchbacks that double back on themselves, ducking under tree limbs that twist across the trail, blackened and grasping, like something out of Snow White’s enchanted wood. 

In an ideal world, I would spend most of my day, every day, running those trails. But, since there are things like life, and work, and the injury I mentioned in the first paragraph, resulting in time spent healing, running up there isn’t a daily occurrence. So I keep running on Emerald in my heart and mind most days, and savor the time when I actually get to run there. Do I float to the top, fly like the wind up or down the trail? No. Some days are hard going, and I’m challenged to put one foot in front of the other. But running on Emerald is the best, even on the worst days.

Emerald Mountain - More Than A Gem (Part 2 0f 3)
Emerald: A Singularly Satisfying Run (Part 3 of 3)

The first time I saw “Halloween,” John Carpenter’s 1978 groundbreaking horror flick (it banked a whopping $70 million on a measly $325,000 production budget), it was on VHS, and I was hosting a slumber party with my gang of 8th-grade besties. We were all lined up inches from the TV, hanging on the edges of our sleeping bags, when my dad snuck up on us to blare the condor horn. He says it was the original wave, as, one at a time, each girl a fraction of a second behind the one next to her, peeled back from the blast in screaming in sheer terror. To this day, when hearing even the first notes of the main “Halloween” theme, I get the good kind of chills. 

Why is this? Do people like to get scared? 
Yes, we like to be scared, as long as there are parameters: we know we are not truly in danger, we have some say (we can leave the haunted house or hide behind the couch during the VHS movie 🫣), and we’re in the sweet spot of being somewhat scared but not absolutely terrified. 
​
These days, for example, I accelerate from scared to terrified in the space of one two-minute horror film trailer. The last trailer I watched gave me nightmares for a week. Sad, but true.

A few reasons why we like to be scared:

1. Brain chemicals. Initial stimulus creates that fight or flight, releasing adrenaline and epinephrine, producing alertness. Following the scare, when your brain has determined that you are not in true danger, endorphins and dopamine sweep in, resulting in a bit of euphoria.
2. Psychological. When we make it through a scary movie or haunted house, we feel that we’ve overcome a challenge. And, interestingly, according to this Guardian article, horror fans surveyed during the Covid pandemic demonstrated greater psychological resilience than their non-horror-fan counterparts. We might also find that a frightening flick allows us to explore the darker side of life without actually having to go there ourselves.
3. Social bonding. When we go through a scare and the euphoric aftermath in the company of others, we associate that feel-good response with the other people.  
4. Learning. The Guardian article also discusses the idea that frightening tales and films offer perspective on our collective fears. Think of stories told to children to teach of the dangers of people or animals out to do us harm. Think of the films depicting the aftermath of nuclear war ("The Day After"), the takeover of machines ("Terminator"), and wars with aliens ("War of the Worlds," "Independence Day").

I would also offer the idea that we may like spooky stories because we don’t know it all. These stories may offer glimmers of possible explanations. And I think intrigue is something most of us find compelling. 

“There are more things in Heaven and Earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy.”
-William Shakespeare, “Hamlet”

Learn more
​Article: The Guardian, “Why We Enjoy Fear…”

​
Originally published October, 2022

​Years ago when reading Stephen Covey’s “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People,” I was struck by something he mentioned early in the book: Character Ethic versus Personality Ethic.

In the 1970’s Covey did an in-depth study of success literature in the United States. He found that in the 1920’s and ‘30’s, the literature shifted focus from developing principles like integrity and trust (Character Ethic) to a focus based on techniques to manage how one appears to others, manipulation of perception (Personality Ethic). Here’s a video of Stephen Covey explaining this concept. 

In both my work and personal life, I am passionate about and committed to transformation for the long-haul. This is work that involves introspection and self-awareness - in the realm of character ethic - and is not a quick and easy endeavor. And yet the messages all around us, from books, podcasts, articles, companies, social media “influencers,” seem to echo the same unrealistic message of “Get Great Quick” personality ethic. 

Messages like “kick those bad habits forever, guaranteed!!” and “achieve your wildest dreams in just three days!!” offer shortcuts, quick fixes, and one-size-fits-all instructions, but they don’t work, not for real change. These techniques might help with some initial success but they don’t last.

Why? Partly because personal work is ongoing, and often involves daily practice rather than one-and-done. And partly because each of us is an amazing individual. And to continue to develop our character, uncover that amazingness, we have to put in effort tailored to our own lives. I call it shoveling out the stable. You’ve got to move out the manure (old habits, patterns, beliefs, and behaviors) in order to really see what you are made of. 

This is sometimes hard work, but it is good work. Work that you’ve probably already been doing in order to get through life’s sometimes excruciating curve balls. Developing character, inner awareness, new insights, and changing actions to get different results is truly a lifelong process. It is rewarding to apply new learning and to cultivate new habits in order to go through the day proud of how you look, feel and act.

I think Stephen King says it best: “It is the dab of grit that seeps into an oyster's shell that makes the pearl, not pearl-making seminars with other oysters."

Originally published July 2022

​Independence, noun: the ability to live your life without being helped or influenced by other people. (Cambridge Dictionary)

Tomorrow is Independence Day in the U.S. Flags, parades, hot dogs, hot weather. Summer’s climax. 

But on this morning’s hike, straps biting into my shoulders with 20 lbs of dumbbells in my daypack, I have another sort of independence on my mind: independently aging. To me that means aging capably, cultivating resilience in both body and mind as the years go by.

Surely this starts with mindset. Because, things happen as we age. Unexpected things like a chronic pain or illness, a cardiac event, an injury that takes five times longer to heal than it used to. Things that start to make us reluctant to venture out. Things that make the chair in the summer shade or the soft warm winter couch alluring for too many days or hours. Those cozy spots are siren calls, and we might then find ourselves wrecked on the rocks of stiffness, immobility, enervation and ennui. 

Sometimes mindset needs a little work. Those mornings when I dread getting out of bed to go run up a hill, I think into the near future, when I’m back from that run. I know I’ll feel energized, clear-headed, and fully alive. I know that the sooner I get out the door, the sooner I’ll be drinking coffee and eating my yummy breakfast. Cultivating this discipline helps my mind stay resilient in the face of discomfort and challenge.

Physical challenges are sometimes a matter of the patience to build up to something. Doing fingertip pushups to make my hands stronger for my massage work has been a game-changer. Several years ago, I could have quit and chalked it up to my hands being too old and too tired. I decided instead to get stronger. At first I could just do two or three fingertip pushups. I’m now doing 60 (to be clear, I’m on my knees). Building the strength in my hands and arms means that I continue to do the work I love, and the sense of capability plays out in other areas of my life as well - like paddleboarding Pearl Lake!

Independently aging also means having the perspective of the long game. Things might take longer to do than they used to. Healing time might be longer, recovery and rest are more of a priority, new goals need a longer timeline. I so often hear from folks older than me their seeming amazement that they haven’t recovered from this injury or that joint replacement within the tiny window of time they allotted. I wish they’d tune in to what their body requires, work together with their own body as a team, and I think the recovery would be much more successful despite the time necessary. This too speaks to cultivating resilience. 

Years ago, I had a client named Sylvia. Sylvia was a feisty Italian woman who’d run a grocery in New York City with her husband while they raised their family. Due to an aneurysm decades before, Sylvia had progressive neurological issues. The warm pool at the retirement campus where I worked was important therapy for her, and she’d get a massage afterward. 
​
She’d come down the hall to my office, first with a cane and later in an electric wheelchair, her white hair elegantly styled, make-up and dress impeccable. This took a painstaking amount of time, but Sylvia would not walk out unless her appearance was just so. She did everything this way. 

Getting ready took longer and longer as she moved more slowly. She shared how it might take her two hours to get a simple meal together at her home, where she lived alone. There came a day when she hired someone to clean, and then someone to take her to the grocery store. I asked her about that. She said, “I hope that I’m never too stupid to ask for help when I truly need it.” 

Her words have stayed with me. Sylvia was independently aging. She had the discipline, the mindset, and the courage to live her life on her terms. When challenges came, she figured them out. Even when it meant being smart enough to ask for help when she was ready.

​Have you ever walked out of a massage feeling more stressed than when you walked in? Probably not. Most clients look more relaxed through their faces and the way they are holding themselves, and report that they feel more at ease. Some tell me how much better they sleep that night. 

What does the research show?
Numerous studies have shown that massage decreases stress, anxiety, and depression, in populations young and old, in preterm infants and their parents, in pregnant women. For example, one study measured salivary cortisol (stress hormone) in both preterm infants and their mothers before and after the mothers massaged their infants. Cortisol levels significantly decreased in the mothers after giving the massage. Although prior studies have demonstrated the benefits of massage for this population (preterm infants and parents) using observational data, this study was the first to measure a physiological stress marker. (See study here.)

Another study in 2020 looked at chronic back pain in women, and specifically the effect of massage on pain and depression. The study utilized massage techniques that focused on slow, superficial strokes along the back, shoulder and neck, and found there was a significant decrease in pain and depression compared with classic massage technique. (See study here.)
 
Massage can ease held emotions
You may have heard that emotions are stored in the body. One possible explanation for this is that in a situation where a strong emotional reaction is involved, a person may physically hold themselves back from expressing their feelings. This holding back results in tension in the muscles and connective tissues doing the holding. During a massage, when the muscle tension is addressed and released, the emotions which created the tension can also release. 

This is where the skill, professional training and emotional capacity of the massage therapist come into play. Although a massage therapist is not a psycho-therapist, and thus can not provide counseling during a massage session, the massage therapist can provide a supportive and calm environment for the client. This can include design elements of the massage space, like the colors of the artwork and walls, easy and soothing music, a slight amount of aromatherapy, and a comfortable massage table and room temperature. The massage therapist builds trust by tailoring the massage to the client’s needs, honoring what comes up for the client (words, tears, silence), and providing a space of acceptance and compassion throughout the session.

Massage therapy truly is both physically and emotionally healing.


Sources

• American Massage Therapy Association: Beyond the Physical: Massage Therapy for Emotional Health
• American Massage Therapy Association: A Growing Body of Research Supports the Positive Impact of Massage Therapy for Mental Health
• Mayo Clinic: Mayo Clinic explores: The role of massage therapy for mental health

​The soft breeze riffles the lime-green aspen leaves, popping out with abandon along gleaming white limbs. The ground is carpeted in purple and yellow wildflowers. Red, orange and purple tulips nod their heads, and yellow daffodils push up above lush grasses. It is spring, and birds are singing. 

Bird song is an enchanting accompaniment to the vibrant visual of the outdoors, although it can go unnoticed if we don’t pay attention. The sound of birds singing is a lovely gift. It has real and measurable perks for humans, and serves specific purposes for the birds themselves.

Bird song benefits our mental health. Studies have shown that hearing birdsong decreases feelings of depression and anxiety, and improves mental well-being, even hours later. The studies found significant improvement with listening to audio clips, but being outdoors provides the added benefits of physical exercise and being immersed in nature. 

Nature in general gives us a mental boost and reduces stress. As I wrote in my blog post
Nature Nurtures Our Well-Being, being fully engaged with the experience is where we truly gain positive results. That full engagement requires deliberate focus - not always simple to achieve. 

Has this ever happened to you? You’re wandering along, so lost in thought that you are completely oblivious to your surroundings. You are in a world of outer silence, inner noise. Suddenly, you remember that you’re out here to listen to the birds. Oops. You tune in. And, lo and behold, your ears are inundated by so much singing it’s like being at an open casting call for the musical Hamilton. 

This has certainly happened to me, more than a few times. But when I stop to pay attention to the sounds in the treetops high above me, bird calls and song, shrill and low, short chirps and long bars of sweet music, I am blown away by this free concert. 
Here are a few bird songs I’ve focused on long enough to take note of:

• The haunting call of the Sandhill Crane, echoing across the landscape. It is a repetitive call / gurgle, in the dawn-mist quiet at Pearl Lake. 
• The clicking, trilling, lilting, whistling, chirping, warbling tunes of the Yampa Core Trail Avian Choral Society.
• The panicked, discordant honking of geese as they wobble into flight. Is the fervor of their honking directly related to their wing-flap velocity?

With all this music, I am curious: why do birds sing? This article (Songbird Survival.org: Why do the birds sing) helped me understand why.

The main reasons birds sing:

• To claim territory
• To attract mates
• To take part in courtship rituals
• To communicate. 

In some bird species, only the males sing. A song can indicate - to possible competitors and potential mates - the capabilities of the male. A long, loud song is a mark of strength and endurance, and the ability to defend the territory. A more complex song indicates a male who’s been around long enough to skillfully accomplish that piece.

How lucky that the way in which birds communicate and strut their stuff is such a blessing to our ears. And how lucky too, that the sweet singing of birds benefits our well-being.


Originally published June 2023

​You might notice that going for a walk outdoors when you feel tired, stressed, irritated or sluggish helps you feel better. Time in nature is not only pleasant, it is a powerful component in our well-being. It supports our connection to one another and the larger world and allows us to have greater focus (focused attention is easier in nature than in a big city).

A study at the University of Exeter showed that people who spent at least two hours per week in nature were healthier compared with those who spent less than two hours. Research demonstrates that being in nature helps to reduce fear, anger, depression, anxiety, and even pain. In one study of patients recovering from gallbladder surgery, those who could view a tree from their hospital bed experienced less pain than those who viewed only a wall.

Peter H. Kahn, a professor of psychology at the University of Washington, says that it is important to experience nature not just visually, but to engage fully. The Japanese term for soaking in all of the amazingness of nature is called “forest bathing.” That doesn’t mean you roll around in the dirt, it simply means that you immerse yourself with active awareness in the time you spend outdoors. One of the theories related to forest bathing is that breathing in the scent of the forest aerosols helps increase tumor- and infection-fighting Natural Killer cells. 

Some suggestions for applying all five senses as a way to more completely immerse:

• Listen: birdsong (a soloist bird or an entire choir?), the wind in the trees (needles or leaves?), chattering (squirrels or little kids?!) 
• Feel: the sunshine on your skin, the coolness of the shade, the breeze in your hair
• Smell: sharpness of pine in cold snow, warm musty earth on a sunny trail
• Taste: dust in the heat, ache of frigid cold, tang of rain or humidity
• See: flowers bright and vibrant, grass spring-lime or summer-emerald, pollen-gathering bees, food-gathering chipmunks 

However you choose to engage with nature, know that you are doing your mind and body good.

Sources

• University of Minnesota Article: How Does Nature Impact Our Well-Being?
• Yale Environment 360 Article: Ecopsychology: How Immersion in Nature Benefits Your Health

Originally published April 2023

Have you ever been so stressed out that you can’t think straight? How helpful is the advice to “just breathe” from some well-meaning person? Or you do a quick Google search for taking that high anxiety down a notch, and your result is a picture of a perfect-appearing human in a perfect lotus pose, perfectly blissed out. Not real, not helpful, and, for my money, anxiety-promoting.

A useful strategy for pulling back from the stress-cliff is taking a peek around and becoming aware. If I’m outside, tuning in to the melodic birdsong from the branches overhead, breathing in the sharp evergreen scent, and gazing into the distance - at the Flat Tops or Emerald Mountain - is a sure way to pull me out of my head spin. Inside, I can feel the texture of the floor or the socks under my feet, and listen to the sounds around me - the blowing of the fireplace heat, the hum of the refrigerator.

This awareness, also called mindfulness, is one method of focusing the mind on something other than the stress/anxiety and instead bringing attention to what is actually happening around you in the moment. 

To deepen that, and apply not only to reducing anxiety and stress but reduce the monotony of the daily grind, you have something called “psychological richness.” Philosopher Lorraine Besser and psychologist Shigehiro Oishi have researched and defined the term to mean cognitive engagement. They found that for some, a psychologically rich life surpasses a meaningful or happy life.

The components of psychological richness:

1. Mindfulness 2.0. Paying attention with neutrality - noticing without judgment. That could mean taking in the details of a tree: the roughness and color of the bark, the length of the needles, any bird nests built in its branches. By focusing on the details, you stimulate the mind. 
2. Curiosity. Ask questions to take the mindful details a step further. How does the bark get its different shades of brown? How long did it take the birds to build that nest, and where did they gather those nest-construction materials? These simple questions help expand your perspective.
3. Creativity. Doing something new or differently generates novelty, another way to stimulate the mind. This could be something as simple as taking that walk with the trees and the birds at a different time of day than usual, or reversing the direction of your habitual route. It could mean stopping where you would not typically stop to take a look around and notice something in your surroundings you haven’t before. Breaking monotony, doing something a bit different, are ways to stimulate cognitive engagement.

Psychological richness is an individual concept in that each person will find engagement in their own way. The key is to start simple with using mindfulness 2.0, curiosity, and creativity. You can develop the capacity for psychological richness on a daily basis with small things like the examples above, and it can then be a tool at your fingertips for those stress-filled moments when you need an uncomplicated way to side-step the anxiety and focus on the here and now.

Source/Learn More

• Optimist Daily article: Transform your daily grind with 3 simple strategies for a more engaging life

​Music speaks to us through the entirety of our lives. It brings us back to a time and place, it lulls us to sleep. It can make our workouts more fun, and it can provide the perfect ambiance to an evening of conversation.

Music plays a large part in the work I do. A variety of instrumental folk music supports the relaxation of clients on my massage table. In Essentrics, the music helps us move more fluidly as when increasing movement through the torso, with more purpose as we do plies and leg toning, and with ease during our final stretch. Throughout the workout, our brains are working to match pacing and movements to the music - great for both body and brain health.

Music can also help with specific conditions. In this National Center for Complementary and Integrative Health Article: Music and Health, the many benefits of music-based intervention are documented in scientific reviews. Here are a few:

• Improves depression
• Decreases pain
• Decreases anxiety
• Decreases stress
• Supports gait and walking for those with Multiple Sclerosis and Parkinson’s Disease
• Supports emotional well-being, mood, and quality of life in those with dementia and Alzheimer’s

Our brains benefit from music whether we listen to it, play an instrument, or sing. In this Johns Hopkins Medicine Article: Keep Your Brain Young With Music, one suggestion is listening to your children’s or grandchildren’s music in order to benefit your brain. We can become stuck in a groove (pardon the pun) if we continue to listen to the same music we are comfortable with. Listening to, or learning, new genres helps us stay young. My daughter and I listen to her playlists on all of our road trips, so I feel confident that my brain is learning new music and words every time we travel together.

Music helps us remember things - and not just time and place memories. Think of all the jingles from old television commercials - you probably still know every word. Or songs we learned as children that we can instantly recall even if we haven’t heard them in years. One of my favorite silly songs starts out: “I went to the animal fair…” Do you remember the rest of the words? Here’s a video to help you out: The Animal Fair.

Whether you play, sing, listen, hum or whistle a tune, or tap on the steering wheel while waiting for the light to turn green, music enhances our lives.

Originally published March, 2023